Self Compassion- The Key To Lasting Self Care {and 3 Easy Ways to Be Kinder To Yourself}

Isn’t it ironic that we are much kinder to other people than we are to our own selves?

Today , November 13th, happens to be World Kindness Day, and I’d like to invite you to show some kindness towards yourself.

Personally, many things have happened in 2018, the most significant one being that I added quite some weight. I wasn’t very comfortable in my skin and I almost allowed my negative self-chatter and self-criticism to destroy me. 

don't be mean

I also remember calling my brother in tears because I wasn't able to do something and as I was crying, I said that I felt guilty, defeated, incompetent, incapable and all the other failure words I could think of.

My brother {bless his wisdom} stopped me and reminded me to stop being so hard on myself, pegging my self worth on apparent my ‘failures.’

This year, I have come to learn that being kind and compassionate towards myself is an important part of the self-care process.

Self-care definitely demands discipline, but your efforts will fail unless you can choose to be kind to yourself. 

This means meeting yourself where you are, respecting the circumstances that you’re dealing with, and being honest with yourself about what is working and what you can really do.

 

I’d like to share 3 tips to help you be kinder towards yourself. Think of them as strategies you can use to take better care of yourself, without creating more overwhelm.

1| It’s OK To Change Your Mind

When it comes to self-care, your approach is (almost) everything.

If one thing isn’t working as well as it used to one month ago, let it go and find something that brings you greater joy NOW.

For me, I had to understand that my eating habits were brought on by stress and anxiety and I needed to do something to change that.

I needed to make a couple of decisions based on what my needs were at the time. One of the things I did was sleep a whole lot more, until I was embarrassed by how much I was sleeping. But that’s what my body needed and it worked out just fine.

Self-care happens in the present, on a moment-by-moment basis.

2| Acknowledge All Your Feelings

{And Allow Yourself To Do What You Need To Do To Feel Good.}

My clothes no longer fit as well as they used to, my yoga practice felt like it was a competition and creating content for my website and social media felt like a chore.

I had reached a point where I was tired of trying to prove myself.

The moment I acknowledged how tired and dissatisfied I was, it only made sense to take one month off posting from social media, including participating in yoga challenges on Instagram. 

I didn't practice yoga for one whole month.

It was the best decision I could ever have taken because I realized my body and soul were in need of a break.

If you are tired, do something that will refuel, refresh, and rejuvenate you. THAT is self-care. 

 

3| Practice Small Acts Of Self Kindness

Self-care is defined as the small, everyday actions that you do {or don't do, as the case may be} with the aim of nurturing yourself.

Practicing small, simple things that take little to no effort is a beautiful exercise in nurturing and taking care of you.

In my Desire Map Planner, there’s a bit sectioned To Do ….Prioritize Pleasure. On that list I normally have yoga, meditation, buying myself flowers or making a breakfast smoothie. Sometimes I simply schedule in rest time.

I enjoy serving myself a herbal infusion in my favourite blue mug every evening and savouring that opportunity to unwind and relax with myself.

As an extra special treat, I enjoy diffusing essential oils that will encourage me to practice kindness towards myself. My favourites are geranium, grapefruit, fennel, eucalyptus and pink pepper

Sometimes, I choose to listen to my favourite songs as I’m getting ready in the morning or I opt for complete silence.

Do one lovely thing for yourself every day, no matter how small and insignificant it appears.

 This will teach you that taking better care of you doesn’t have to be a huge project. You’ll also see the benefits quickly and you’ll probably start seeing more and more small things that you can do.

 Start with self-compassion. Start Small. And start now.

be gentle

Your Turn

Are you constantly hard on yourself?

Share with me in the comments how you can be a little bit gentler, kinder and more compassionate towards yourself?

ps: if you know someone who needs this reminder, please forward this to them!